Thursday 13 - Kids say the darndest things edition

Yet again, I have fallen into the procrastination trap! I know it’s Friday (and I’m behind), but it’s better late than never, right?? Because my little one cracks me up so much, I thought I’d share a few things that he’s said lately that make me laugh. I need to start writing these things down so I can relive the experiences for years to come!

1. I was looking through pictures one day to find some “before” photos for a project I was working on. My son peers over my shoulder and says, “Mom, you look fat there and are wearing way too much lipstick.” Boy, kids are so honest!

2. My son came home from his first day of summer “campus club” and let me know he met a girl. He was so excited because she let him hold her hand. Then I asked, “What is her name?” He replied, “Mom, we didn’t get that far.”

3. While we were sitting down finishing our dinner I had asked him to taste something that I had a feeling he wouldn’t like. He replied with, “I would love to Mom, but I’m cutting back. I need to lose some weight.” I guess that’s a constant that he hears in my house.

4. On Mother’s Day we were talking about gifts. I said, “A good gift for a Mom to receive would be a child who listens, minds, and does what they are supposed to.” My son replied with, “Whew, it’s a good thing I already got you a gift.”

5. My son makes a funny sound when he drinks. I was irritated with this one day and I decided to say something to him. He kept making the noise. I couldn’t figure out if he was trying to drink without the noise or if he just liked to hear it. He then calmly turned to me and said, “Mom, it’s natural. You’re going to have to get used to it.”

6. I still like to call the little one “baby”. Apparently, he doesn’t like that. Who knew? So, one day, when we were in the car he said, “I know it will be hard but can you not call me baby anymore? It’s ok if we are at home, but not out – ok?” Who knew a seven year old could be so concerned, and recognize how difficult it will be for me. Sweetheart!

7. “Mom, she likes me because I’ve got crazy dance moves.”

8. “Oh, my beautiful teeth!” – said right after he fell on a water slide and knocked out his two, front, permanent teeth (this just happened about 3 weeks ago). Can we say vain?

9. “I’m seven, but I look like an 8 or 9 year old, huh?” I guess I have talked about how big my kid is a little too much?

10. “Free food is so much better than pay for food, right?” – can you tell that my son doesn’t like to eat out. He’s a strange one.

11. When trying to get out of sleeping in his own bed, he came to me and said, “Mom, I think I should sleep with you because I don’t want you to be scared and have bad dreams. If I sleep with you, I can be right here to protect you.”

12. “We’ve got lots of things we could eat – at home.” Yet another tactic to not have to go out to eat.

13. I went through a phase where I was going on dates. I think Jacob was a little jealous and he said that he wanted to take me on a date. So, I agreed (because it was sweet as can be). We were talking about how he was going to take me to my favorite place, open the doors, order for me, and things he had seen on TV or something. I then said, “Are you going to pay for it too.” He said, “yes.” Then I asked, “Where are you going to get the money?” He quickly replied with, “I guess I’m going to have to borrow some money.”

Just rethinking these moments has put a very big smile on my face today. I don’t know where he comes up with this stuff, but I sure do get a kick out of it. I could write a book!

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Friday! It's a good thing!

I feel like I've been waiting for this day to come all week long! On Monday, I was wishing it was Friday already. And now . . . it's here. Whatever will I do with it?

I will take this day while "jumping for joy" that I don't have to be back at work tomorrow!!!! Yeehaw! Not to mention I have an appointment to get my hair cut and colored tonight. I'm super excited about it. My hair will be cute again!

So, I have a little story. I'm gonna ramble and it may get ugly, but I'm going to let it out anyway. I'm a little torn and don't really know why. If you read the blog, you know that I've been struggling to get to where I can say, "I've lost 100 lbs". Honestly, I thought I had given up. There's seriously a part of me that has been sitting back saying, "It's not going to happen, you're just supposed to be bigger." And, I've believed it. So, I kind of resolved (with myself) that my goal should be 170. But there's a part of me that wasn't completely ready to give that up either.

I typically weigh myself on Tuesdays. I'm not normally tempted to weigh any other day. But for some reason, I was yesterday. So, I got on the scale and I saw it. Yes sir, the scale said, "169". Not even a smidge extra (no - .2 or .5 or .75), it was right on (almost a little lower). I stood there in shock. I didn't know what to do. I didn't even know if I should be excited or share or anything. So, what did I do? I went on with my day and acted like it didn't happen. Why would I rob myself of a celebration when that's what I have been working so hard to get to? I kept telling myself that I shouldn't have weighed. It was Thursday and I can't really count it until Tuesday. But there's a part of me that afraid that the number will change and I won't be able to claim it on Tuesday. That's why I couldn't count it or be excited about it or even be thrilled that it was below 170 - even once!

Finally, when my family and I sat down for dinner, I asked the question, "Did anyone weigh today?" I live in a house where we all struggle with weight and we're all working toward a goal of getting healthier, so I knew someone would've weighed. I wanted to find out if anyone else had success because I wanted to celebrate something, but for some reason didn't feel like my celebration was worthy. Sure enough, my sister had weighed (and was down a total of 11.5 lbs -YAHOO) and she even noticed that I had reached that "goal" that I had been pushing for. I didn't know what to say. I knew I wanted to be able to appreciate that number I saw. But I still didn't. It was strange.

My mother asked me, "so how does it feel to have lost 100lbs?" I responded with, "The same as it did at 99lbs."

I don't completely know what's going on in my head. I don't even know what to do about it. But I wanted to get it off my chest. I should probably make an appointment with the therapist! I want to feel good about the progress. I want to feel successful. But for some reason - even though I see it - I don't believe it. I guess I never really thought that I would succeed - even though I've sworn to everyone that I could and that I will. I still don't believe it. I think that there's a part of me that is afraid that once I get to "goal" I will not have anything to work so hard for. Even though I know that maintenance will be even HARDER than this past transition.

So, right now, I'm claiming it! I have OFFICIALLY lost 100 lbs!!!!! I am OFFICIALLY 9 lbs away from the original goal set for me at the time of my surgery. I cannot believe it. I don't even know what to do with it, but I am going to accept it! Once I get to the next goal, I get to re-evaluate and decide what the other goals should be. I just need to be able to accept them when I get there.

So, this weekend, I think my cute little haircut and I are going to go shopping. I HATE shopping, I do, I do, but I do need some things and I think I'm going to try to enjoy the experience and the idea of a reward. Besides, I haven't taken pictures in forever, so it's about time I get some updates going. Anyone want to join me? Let's celebrate!

Happy Friday!!!

It's a great day for a funny story, don't you think?

And I just so happen to have a funny story! At least I think it's funny.

So, all you C & P girls (Thank you for this term Jil - Whether your co-worker knows it or not, she's created quite a "fun" word for such a Wonderful group of people) will have to let me know if this happens to you. I'm only saying this because this isn't the first time it's happened to me.

On to the story . . . today at work I was having to clean out what I like to call the "crap closet". Well, a vendor (that usually comes by often but since we've been slow hasn't been around) was in the plant and he saw me walking by. He said to me, "Hey girl, how are you?" and at that point I just KNEW that he didn't remember my name. I politely responded with, "I'm good thanks" and wondered on my way. Then the gentleman came into the office and stopped me and at that point he remembered my name. He said, "Wow, you've lost a lot of weight!" Of course, I responded with, "Yep, I sure have." He then proceeded to tell me that he didn't recognize me outside and honestly had no idea that was me. Of course, he was being very complimentary and I accepted the compliments with a smile (which, if anyone knows me, is INCREDIBLY difficult for me to do).
Here's where the funny part comes in. He then went on to tell me that he's working hard and trying to lose weight too. He said he knows it takes a lot of work but sometimes he's too lazy or doesn't think about what he's doing or fails to follow through on weekends - and on, and on, and on as if I were his personal trainer or counselor and he needed to make up excuses as to why he hasn't lost weight. The reason this is so funny to be is because he's not the first person to do this! This seems to happen often times when I see someone that I haven't been around in a while. Now, we need to keep in mind that the people who are feeding me these excuses don't necessarily know that I went through the C & P procedure. I don't know if they would change their tune if they knew this information or not. Typically when people find out about that they say stupid, ignorant things like "you took the easy way out" or "it's easy for you" or some other bull that is totally untrue.

Go ahead. Spill it. Does this ever happen to you?

I wonder . . . if I hadn't been over 100 lbs over weight and only had about 20 - 30 to lose and did so, would I get the same response? Or, is it that it's just so noticeable and people KNOW how hard it is to lose so much weight (no matter which way you chose to save your life) so they want to feel like they can accomplish something too?

This is just something that struck me as funny and odd today. I look back to a year or two ago and wish I would've made myself more accountable when I saw the success of others. Unfortunately, at that point in my life, any expression or desire to succeed in the shadow of others was merely an expression without the passion to follow it up. I thank God every day for bringing me to that point of recognizing the desperation (so to speak) and helping me to realize that I could manage the journey, not without trial, but with love and encouragement and I'm so glad that I listened!

What a WOW weekend!

Yes, it's true. I had a major turning point/"wow" moment this weekend! I actually had quite a weekend of realizations and coming to terms with "me" that made for a very freeing experience. I've been battling with some of my thoughts and emotions for a little while. This weekend I came to the realization that I had set my sights on something that may not be the best thing for me. The good part about this is that I'm ok with this decision. When I came to terms with this realization, I experienced a sort of freedom, confidence, and understanding that there's more out there for me and I am ready to move on. Sure, it could've been a sad moment, but that's not what I wanted it to be, therefore, it wasn't. It was great! I felt like I had a new clarity, I had turned a new leaf, and I was excited about the other leaves I was going to get to turn over!

So, the real "WOW" moment came when I decided that I needed a new pair of jeans. I had decided that I was going to go to a club to watch a friend of mine break out his stand-up routine. Well, I certainly couldn't go in what I had, so I had to borrow a cute shirt and I thought I'd go out and get a pair of jeans that fit me so I'd look good for this occasion.

I decided to go to Kohl's because I know that they have Levi's and those typically look decent on me. So, I went in and gathered up about 7 different styles of Levi's (529, 505, 548, etc.) in a size 14, feeling pretty confident that they would fit. Well, as I was walking away, I saw a size 12 and I thought to myself, "I'm gonna grab this just to see how far I am away from fitting in them". Let's keep in mind, I've never (in my adult life) been a size 12. Maybe 5th grade or so, but definitely not since the teen years. So, even though I thought it was laughable, I brought them with me.

I get to the dressing room and I figured that if I'm going to be depressed by the size 12 then I may as well put them on first so I know how much work I have to put in to get them on. So, I did! Much to my surprise, they came all the way up. Yep! And then, the even bigger surprise was that they buttoned AND zipped without my even sucking in my gut. NO WAY! Are you serious? These must have been miss labeled. A 12???? REALLY??? I almost cried! My poor little 5 year old had no idea what to think of me. I asked him if they looked good and he said, "ummm, I'm going to say YES!" It was cute. It was sweet. And he was just as excited for me as I was. So, I said, "What do I do now? All I brought in were size 14s and these 12s." Jacob so kindly said, "I'll go get you 12s Mom. I think that's what you'll need". What a great kid! So we ventured out and got about 4 styles in the 12s and I walked out with 2 pair of the size 12 Levis and a huge grin on my face. Sure, the grin was mostly in dis-belief, but boy was I grinning! I still don't think they look like size 12 nor do I think I look like I should fit in a size 12, but I'm certainly NOT taking them back!!! :-)

The great thing about this weekend is that I have a new motivation. I am being rewarded for the trials and the hard times I've been dealing with and it's really making me want to work harder and do more. I'm excited to see what else there is in store. What is next? Bring on the WOW moments!!!!!

What a weekend!

I had anticipated this past weekend for a while and boy was it worth it.

So, my company had our Christmas party this past weekend and it was a huge success. I was incredibly busy with all of the preparations, shopping, wrapping, etc. that I wasn't able to blog much in the last week or two, but now that's all over and it was a hit. I had a blast and I felt great!

I was able to go in and get a new hair cut/color in preparation for the event. I had a new dress. I felt good and I, personally, think I looked pretty good also. Not to mention that my friend from Orange County came all the way up here to be my date! He was a fabulous date! In fact, spending all of the time with him this weekend made me really miss him and miss having him around. We've known each other for 10 years! I need to spend more time with Dan! Spending time with Dan also helped me to realize what I'm looking for in a dating relationship. If I don't find dates with similar personalities as these friends that I cherish, the dating is not going to go very far.

So, one of the funniest instances of the weekend was the "realization" that people had that something was different about me. The funniest thing was that they all thought I looked different because of the new hair do! Not everyone around me has been privy to the "WLS" details. Some have noticed that I'm losing weight, some haven't noticed anything at all. If I had a dollar for every person that said, "There's something different about you - Oh, you changed your hair" - I would be a much wealthier person (ok, maybe by like $25, but that's something, right?)! It was great!

I've got some more excitement happening. I get to spend time in Orange County this weekend catching up with friends and I'm super, duper excited about it! My friend Craig, from Florida, (whom I haven't seen in over 6 years) will be in town. I've already warned him that I have huge expectations. I can't wait to get a big, giant hug from him.

I will say, with the exception of some financial turmoil, things are going pretty well for me right now. I'm excited about the holidays. I'm exciting about seeing and visiting with friends and family. And I'm most especially excited about the new me. I feel better, I look better, I have more energy, and I can't wait to experience what's ahead! Things are going well and I'm excited to live the life I should be living! Now, if I could just get back onto the "exercise band wagon" I'd be set!

It's a small world after all . . . .

And I'm not joking about this one!

Ready for a funny story?

So, I believe that I've shared with many of you that I have "bitten the bullet" and have signed up with eHarmony.com to get myself into a more social atmosphere. Of course, I'm still not sure if this is a good idea because I'm incredibly skeptical of the people that are on there or even out there (thanks to the last date that I had). Yet, I'm wanting to get into the "scene" and get my "feelers" out there (as my sister has suggested) so there I find myself.

So, I've had one face to face meeting with an eHarmony-er and I won't be going out with that one again (if I have anything to say about it). Now, I've been emailing with a couple of others and thinking that we may be close to a face to face meeting as well. One of these individuals and I started sharing information over email. Of course, on email, he seems great. He's apparently intelligent, witty, humorous, adventurous, and hopefully many other things. So, things were going well and then I asked if he has lived in Fresno (the Valley) all his life. Well, as it turns out, he grew up in the small, itty-bitty town that I work in! WHAT?

Yes, I work in a very small town. The population is 20,000 people, but 12,000 of those people are prison inmates! So, with a small town, you get small town people and small town talk (Just a little background). Anyway, I thought this was incredibly funny. At this point, I don't think this gentleman shares my humor. I think he may be feeling a little bit insecure. But let's be honest, I'm not going to go around asking about it. I just think it's hysterical.

Of course, I don't know that we will ever meet face to face (especially now). I don't know that this will go anywhere. I just find it amusing that in such a big world we can have something so common between two people. It may be too much for him to bear, but I think it's absolutely hysterical!

So, now, of course, I wonder what it is he doesn't want me to know? Hmmmmm. Did someone say challenge?

Here's to Mr. Corcoran!!