It's going to be a BIG day!

First off let me start by saying "THANK YOU" for your support and words of encouragement. The news (of not getting the job) was a big deal for me this week, but I'm convinced that it'll all work out. You all shared agreement that it's obviously not where I was/am supposed to be and I'm looking forward to the opportunity that WILL be perfect for me. I'm hoping that the place that does fit will keep me happy for a long time to come. And Jil, I'll take your comments and encouragement any way I can get them late or not - before Laurie or not - with a happy meal toy or without!! :-) Thank you All! You mean a great deal to me!

So on to the BIG day! Today I will be joining my cousin, her daughters and a bunch of friends (in honor of a birthday) for an adventure at Six Flags Magic Mountain. Let's talk about what is so exciting about this. I haven't been to Six Flags in years. So, we all know what this means, right? Previously, when I went to the theme park, I would anxiously stand in line wondering if I was going to fit in the seat belt. On one occasion, the park/ride attendant had to PUSH the restraint/harness down to get it to snap in. I played it off like it wasn't a big deal but in reality I was mortified. Today I will go to this theme park and I am pretty sure that I will fit in EVERY ride I want to go on. I'm not going to say that I'm not going to remember those previous moments or even think (for a moment) that I may not fit. But to be completely real, I WILL fit! I may even have extra room. I cannot tell you how that will feel. But I'm sure that I'll be able to report this when I return.

So, today, I am off for a new adventure. I'm looking to explore happiness (as opposed to anxiety) of a theme park and I am looking forward to having a smile on my face the whole day! Let's hope I get some pictures out of it too! :-)

I hope you're all in for a Happy Friday!!!

Maybe I was wrong?

Who knew that a 10' (diameter) pool CAN be a form of exercise. Of course, the seven year old that wouldn't let me sit down certainly helped. Together we made that pool an exercise pit! We were throwing balls, chasing each other around, running to make whirlpools, and doing what he calls "yoga poses" in the pool. We were out there for 2 and a half hours and I loved every minute of it! I think you're all right. I'm coming to terms with the fact that it's all about the attitude! And boy, is mine changing fast! Thank goodness!!!

I have to thank Kristin for the comment yesterday. Two years ago I wouldn't have gotten in the pool. In fact, I would sit out in the back yard (fully clothed) and watch the poor, little guy play in the water all by himself. What fun is that? I don't even think I owned a bathing suit then. This time, I was in it! I was playing! I was running! I was having a blast and he loved every minute of it too! I cannot even explain the feeling that came over me yesterday when I realized that. Thank you Kristin for bringing me back to reality, and "bringing the pretty back". My son is going to benefit, even more than I am, from my physical changes. How in the world can you be negative about that??

More good things happening . . . I received a call yesterday in reference to one of the many job applications that I have submitted and they want to interview me! The job is for one of the schools that I was placed for student teaching and I loved it! I was so excited on that I had received the call that I did a little excited gushing (hopefully it wasn't too much). Apparently, this principal has talked to a lot of people and heard nothing but good things about me. I can't tell you how good it felt to hear that. So, I'm doing lots of praying, finger crossing, and whatever things I can to send out good vibes. I am super excited about this opportunity. The interview is next week. Let's hope I can calm down a bit between now and then so I don't appear TOO eager (i.e. - desperate).

Now on to today. We have more fun to conquer, houses to clean, pools to swim in, things to do, and more adventures (without excuses) to embark upon. Who knew that my own son would be some of the best motivation ever? I sure love that little man!

Imagine that . . . it stayed put!

On weigh in day, the scale was still down! Yes, it's a reality and it's official! I've lost 100lbs. Boy, has it been work!!!! But, I get to claim it! Whether I feel it or not. Whether I look it or not. Whether I think I deserve it or not. I'm there! I have lost the weight and I get to claim it!!!! Woo hoo!

I actually was stopped today at my son's Day camp program. A mother from last year recognized Jacob and stopped me. She said, "OH MY! You're kidding. You are Jacob's Mom, right? I didn't even recognize you. I recognized Jacob, but I wouldn't have guessed it was you. How much weight have you lost?" I was a little bit floored. I had no idea why she stopped me. Then, when she was looking shocked, I thought she was going to tell me something bad about my son. But no, she knew that something was different. She was the first person I had to reply with, "I've lost 100 lbs"! Then, it was really real. I had to admit it. I will say, it made me feel good and made me realize that whether I see it or not, there's been a BIG change. She was so proud of me. She told me what a great job and a great thing I had done. Amazed at what had just happened, I walked away with quite a smile!

I went to meet with my surgeon yesterday. He gave me a clean bill of health. All is well and he thinks I'm doing fabulously! He said I look great. In nearly the same breath he said, "have you ever thought about abdominoplasty? I can help you to get a nice, flat, taut, tummy. You could be wearing a bikini." Of course, I told him that there was NOTHING he could do to get me in a bikini - he said, "Oh, I bet I could get you wanting to". Of course, I'm such a modest person that bikini is not in my vocabulary. We'll have to see about that. But, I must admit, he's got me thinking.

Even though I've had some good things happen, It's been a tough day. It's only 8:00pm and I'm ready to go to bed. Let's hope tomorrow is a better day! Will there be a week when every day is a "good" day? I'm waiting - impatiently - for that to happen!

When you need a little reality check . . .

Just go through old pictures, right? Well, I stumbled upon a few pictures today while I was searching for something, and this is what I found. WOW! Really? Sure, I found others too, but this one got me.

I guess there's nothing like making yourself appreciate where you are by looking at where you've been? There's a huge part of me that wanted to delete this immediately when I saw it. It's certainly not the most flattering photo of me (and probably why I stopped taking pictures all together), but then I realized that I WANT this to be a reminder of where I was, how I felt, and how desperate I was to make a change. I want to be able to love myself, my accomplishments, and know that I do deserve to obtain and work toward the finer things in life. What a journey!!!

On a side note, Thanks Liza for the book suggestion! I'll be going out and finding that book this weekend! It sounds like a good one to have. I'll keep you all posted on my progress!

It moved! It moved!!!

That's RIGHT! The scale moved! YIPEE!!! I've got to say that the fact that the scale moved this morning (even though it was only one pound) was the bright spot in my day. The funny thing is that when I saw that the scale had moved, I was so excited that it didn't even occur to me that I had hit another "milestone" moment. It wasn't until I was going around updating my tickers that it hit me. Yes Sir! I have OFFICIALLY lost 90 lbs! Needless to say, that brightened my day even more.

I must admit, I have worked very, very hard for that pound! I successfully made it to the gym AND through full workouts 3 times last week, not including the Saturday afternoon roller skating, and Sunday afternoon softball tossing. I have also increased my water consumption as well as the protein consumption. Though, I still need to get more of that protein in! That has to be the toughest part of this journey for me! Oh yeah, and the carbs. Time for them to go. I let some bad stuff slip in and now I'm trying to cast those Carb demons out of my life!!

Thank you so much for your support, suggestions, and ideas. It's so much easier to NOT get discouraged when you know that there are people out there that have experienced the same thing and can offer suggestions as far as what they do. I can't tell you how much the "blogging" community contributes to my success! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

Now, if I can make it through a torturous day at work, I should have a good evening. I have another session with little Micah, my personal trainer. I'm hoping he'll provide me with some more great tips and give me some good exercises to firm the jiggle. Here's hoping we all have an incredible week!

What a WOW weekend!

Yes, it's true. I had a major turning point/"wow" moment this weekend! I actually had quite a weekend of realizations and coming to terms with "me" that made for a very freeing experience. I've been battling with some of my thoughts and emotions for a little while. This weekend I came to the realization that I had set my sights on something that may not be the best thing for me. The good part about this is that I'm ok with this decision. When I came to terms with this realization, I experienced a sort of freedom, confidence, and understanding that there's more out there for me and I am ready to move on. Sure, it could've been a sad moment, but that's not what I wanted it to be, therefore, it wasn't. It was great! I felt like I had a new clarity, I had turned a new leaf, and I was excited about the other leaves I was going to get to turn over!

So, the real "WOW" moment came when I decided that I needed a new pair of jeans. I had decided that I was going to go to a club to watch a friend of mine break out his stand-up routine. Well, I certainly couldn't go in what I had, so I had to borrow a cute shirt and I thought I'd go out and get a pair of jeans that fit me so I'd look good for this occasion.

I decided to go to Kohl's because I know that they have Levi's and those typically look decent on me. So, I went in and gathered up about 7 different styles of Levi's (529, 505, 548, etc.) in a size 14, feeling pretty confident that they would fit. Well, as I was walking away, I saw a size 12 and I thought to myself, "I'm gonna grab this just to see how far I am away from fitting in them". Let's keep in mind, I've never (in my adult life) been a size 12. Maybe 5th grade or so, but definitely not since the teen years. So, even though I thought it was laughable, I brought them with me.

I get to the dressing room and I figured that if I'm going to be depressed by the size 12 then I may as well put them on first so I know how much work I have to put in to get them on. So, I did! Much to my surprise, they came all the way up. Yep! And then, the even bigger surprise was that they buttoned AND zipped without my even sucking in my gut. NO WAY! Are you serious? These must have been miss labeled. A 12???? REALLY??? I almost cried! My poor little 5 year old had no idea what to think of me. I asked him if they looked good and he said, "ummm, I'm going to say YES!" It was cute. It was sweet. And he was just as excited for me as I was. So, I said, "What do I do now? All I brought in were size 14s and these 12s." Jacob so kindly said, "I'll go get you 12s Mom. I think that's what you'll need". What a great kid! So we ventured out and got about 4 styles in the 12s and I walked out with 2 pair of the size 12 Levis and a huge grin on my face. Sure, the grin was mostly in dis-belief, but boy was I grinning! I still don't think they look like size 12 nor do I think I look like I should fit in a size 12, but I'm certainly NOT taking them back!!! :-)

The great thing about this weekend is that I have a new motivation. I am being rewarded for the trials and the hard times I've been dealing with and it's really making me want to work harder and do more. I'm excited to see what else there is in store. What is next? Bring on the WOW moments!!!!!

It's weigh in day!

Boy! How time flies when we're busy, busy, busy. Tis the season, huh? Well, it's true. The madness began after Thanksgiving when I realized that I have to get ready for our company's Christmas party and I haven't gotten nearly enough done. Fortunately, I'm taking care of this a little at a time, but it's still taking more time than I really have. But, we'll pull it all together and it's going to be great! I'm super excited. We've got great things planned and great things to give away. People are going to love coming to my parties!!! Yipee!

So, today was weigh in day. I can honestly say that I hadn't even thought about a scale ALL week long. In fact, I almost forgot that I was supposed to weigh today. I was at 190.5 - I'm almost out of the 190s. AMAZING!!!! Still feeling good. Hopefully looking good. And now I'm just working toward better! :-)

I did have a "Wow" moment last night. Of course, I have to find a great dress for this weekend's Christmas party. If you've been keeping up with me, you know that I dread shopping and have turned it into an almost phobia. Well, my sister had offered me some dresses, I took them. My roommate had offered me some dresses too. So, last night there was a little fashion show at my house. I was floored! The 16s were too big and the 14s fit! Sure, it's exposing a little more than I want to, but it looks great! A 14 looks great? What in the world? I can only imagine what the 10 will look like (not this year - but maybe next?)! I'll have to post pictures after the event.

Things are going pretty well. I've got a very busy December planned with this week's Christmas party and traveling next week to visit friends in So. Cal., but I'm really looking forward to them all. I can't wait to see so many great people and really get to catch up. That's what Christmas/holiday time is all about - right?

I look forward to having some exciting stories to share!